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Tuesday, September 25, 2012

Every end provides a beginning. Completing the circle in Spain.

This weekend I'm heading to Spain to finish my season off at the Challenge Maresme Barcelona iron distance race. I'm looking forward to it for lots of reasons. Here are a few;

Starting and finishing the ride in Spain at Challenge Barcelona
  • It was my first ironman race (also my first marathon and first pro race) back in 2010 and I really enjoyed the experience. Somehow I managed to come 8th in 10:13 and generally got hooked on all that iron distance racing offers; the preparation, lead up nerves, the highs and lows of the race itself, elation and relief after, the community of positive, driven souls involved and even the sore body to recover that testifies the extent to which you put it all out there on the day.
  • I love Spain, the people, their openness and friendliness especially to children, the food, proximity to the ocean (in Calella anyway), sun, aridness of the southern region and the fun of being somewhere where language is not really an option for communication again as my Spanish is next to non-existant. This year I have started and finished my season at Spanish races and put another one in the middle.
  • There is a strong pro women's field lining up for the race, including a number of friends, so it should be a good challenge that I am feeling fit and ready for (even if a touch end of seasonish) to chase a good time and place outcome.
  • It is the last race of the 2012 season so afterwards I get to have a break, stopping off at Carcasonne/ Narbonne with the kids on the way back and then coming home and relaxing for a few weeks. I know I am mentally and physically ready for some time out, after racing 11 times since April including 4 iron distance races.
  • Once this is done I think...... that pro level racing for this "girl" may be done. Although I love my fitness and health and have no plans to give up on training and racing as an integral part of my life, I think that this will be my last full season racing in the pro ranks. It has been a blast. An awesome opportunity that, coming as I did to triathlon (and competitive sport) in my very late 30s, I had never anticipated and yet have hugely enjoyed. After three seasons focused on the sport, a few factors are conspiring to move me onwards. I really need to have enough time and energy to support the family needs, especially my two lovely boys who I care for solo during the weekdays due to my husbands work, I am ready to spend more energy helping others develop rather than just myself and also I do have my age creeping up into the 40s.  As yet it hasn't slowed me down, although it does probably put a cap on how much further I can expect to progress, particularly when added to my family's needs. I am no 28 yo single chick who has undistracted time, energy and focus to throw into the sport.
  • Onwards and upwards. I see this as an opportunity to refocus my energies, not a loss or full stop to be mourned. Although I have truly loved competing at the highest level, I will keep training for pleasure as I hope I have (nearly) always done, and may take the opportunity to try some new things to keep up the motivation but from a different angle, starting with some cross country ski races this winter and possibly mixing in some trail running next year. All good excuses to keep spending plenty of time in our beautiful mountains.
  • I'm also looking forward to having more time to help others rather than primarily myself develop in triathlon, enjoying the progression and rewards physically, mentally and emotionally that the sport/s offer. I have really enjoyed the triathlon camps I have been coaching at in the Aravis for a few years now but wish to add a few new layers to this, both face to face and online. Watch this space, more coming soon. 
On course Challenge Barcelona, 2010
For now time to get my head, heart and body prepared for the challenge that is Challenge Barcelona. Tomorrow we leave for Spain. The journey of my pro tri career started there in 2010 and will likely finish there this weekend. It seems appropriate. Wish me luck. Right now I'm just hoping my immune system is in good shape as we've had a weekend with Jackson really unwell with a gastro and cough combo. He has bounced back fast in usual form and so far no one else is showing any symptoms. Fingers crossed it stays that way.

A huge thanks to everyone who has helped me along the way these past few years as I have had this opportunity to race as a pro; family, coaches, sponsors, friends, team mates, fellow triathletes, home stay friends, race organisers .... It has been a ride! One more circuit, at full throttle. Barca here we come!



À bientôt / See you soon

Christine

Tuesday, September 4, 2012

Embrun, a true enDURance race

On the bike course at Embrun. Très dur!
Ironman races are not meant to be easy. I certainly have never found them to be anything but long, hard days. Challenging, rewarding, delving deeper within than average experiences allow, but always hard, or as the French say, "dur".  If you are feeling great on race day, you just go faster so push harder to get into the sustainably uncomfortable work zone. If you are doing it tough anyway due to weather, illness, poor preparation ... then it will be a long time before you will be back in the comfort zone of normal life. Even in irondistance races though, there are those that were designed to be harder than most. Some of the variables to mix up the formula to a stronger brew include heat, wind, hills or even cultural/travel challenges like time zones, food, language, familiarity etc.

Embrunman, is the double expresso of irondistance racing. It clearly has been both designed, and is served with pride in being the toughest race on offer. In a style that is a bit quirky as with many elements of the race, it is offered each year on the 15th of August (Assumption Day), whatever day of the week that happens to fall on. This year it was a Wednesday. You may well need Mary's heavenly intervention to race it as it is a different level of challenge to the average. It is almost the antithesis of the relatively fast, city based, prepackaged, international flavoured, WTC endorsed, glossy brochure prepped, Mdot managed affair I last attempted in Zurich. 

Embrun is the perfect location to host such an epic. It is no new concept as it has been serving a long distance triathlon race here for 29 years now. The town centre is a gorgeous old stone settlement surrounding the initial hubs of the cathedral, monastery and hospital. It is perched on a flat area on top of a cliff above a huge lake, tucked in a valley between the mountains of the Parc National des Ecrins and the main range of the Alps that divides Italy from France, +4000m both directions. However this race throws out a few bonus challenges besides the obvious less than flat environment.

The only flat bit, the swim commences at 5:50am for the women and 6:00am for the men who obviously needed a few more minutes of beauty sleep! Sunrise on race day was not until 6:46am so you start in the pitch black following a small flashing light on the back of one kayak that moves at the pace of the lead bunch. The far buoy had a small flasher on it so could be seen once you are within about 50m of it. Not so helpful to me as I had fallen behind the lead women's group led by Juliette Benedicto, Bella Bayliss and Erica Csomor by the first buoy. I managed to get stuck between the first two women's groups so had the very weird experience of swimming most of the two laps in the dark by myself. It was very calm and quite lovely swimming alone with almost no visual references, on super still, warm 22o lake water. It was easy to focus on stroke quality but harder to fire all systems to race pace without the usual adrenaline boosting hubbub of elbows and feet all around me. There were of course others on the lake (1000 or so swimmers plus kayaks etc) but other than a ref / race boat coming and telling me I was heading off course at one point and a few small groups of the faster men passing me on the second lap, I really had to find my own way and keep my focus.

On the first major descent back to the lake
Out onto the bike course and the natural challenges and beauty of the region unveiled themselves km by km. The first 44k loop around the northern section of Lac de Serre-Poncon and back to Embrun is a nice warm up with some relatively short but solid inclines and a really fun,  fast descent back to the lake. The cross winds on the bridge were not too bad at this time of day. Once on the southern side of the lake the morning winds faced us as we headed up the valley for the next 30k or so to Mt Dauphin. This was a part of the course I knew well having ridden it a couple of times last year on Epic Camp (it is also the Embrun OD course) so I enjoyed vying with a few girls and getting into my bike groove. I got to head back past town where I collected the great energy boost as I passed the boys and Rob by the roundabout where we turned towards our next major obstacle, Col d'Izoard.

Nutrition is one of Embrunman's added bonus challenges. Unlike the standard Mdot, Powerbar sponsored affairs, Embrunman is a race where simply finding out where the aid stations are seems to be a well kept secret only known to those who have raced there before or know some secret handshake/Haute Alps code. The aid station locations are not marked in the brochure or online info. Even in the race briefing they flicked up a slide with the locations for a total of about 0.5 seconds. Just long enough to realise there were some big gaps between some of them. I did however spot a piece of paper stuck to a desk by the registration with details of the locations that I quickly photographed into my iphone and later transcribed onto the course map with the help of an independently created online bike route map, as there are no km markings on the official race provided course maps.

Even bike racking is a bit bizarre
What is provided at these aid stations is yet another mystery. The online info was great in it's English version. It seemed that granny bars were available in transition and salty sandwiches were provided in the swim?! Despite being a "masters" category athlete I am not yet a granny, or particularly fond of sandwiches while swimming, salty or not. Even the French version seemed sketchy in detail. Nuts, dried fruit, fruit and salty potatoes were the solids listed as being offered at some aid stations with some foods and drink only offered in an aid station near the transition area which is not so helpful on a one lap bike course. It was not specified which stations had solids on offer except the there was food at the one on top of the col as well as a special needs station. Coke, water and a homemade isotonic drink were offered for liquids. Some aid stations offered "sports drink" as well which turned out to mean Gatorade in bottles that were too small for the standard bidon holder. All bidons had to be exchanged for good environmental reasons within the aid station areas. However some stations were really short and on fast sections of the course, so it made the need for very slick, focussed handovers, especially if you needed two bottles to be replaced in one station.

By the turn up to Guillestre I was working hard to keep both energy and hydration up, knowing how important it would be to getting to the run in good shape on such a long, hot day. Early on the bike course I had already sampled some of the homemade electrolyte drink provided. It tasted pretty good and I would guess was about 4% concentration which suited me. However it was a mystery as to what was in it, how many carbs, salt etc you got as well as how your body would react to it. Not a great place to test something new, but not many alternatives out there as the Gatorade was too hard to keep given the bottle sizes and only offered at a couple of stations anyway, I don't like coke on the bike leg and water wasn't an option for such a long hot day. My guess from tasting the drink is that it was a mix of lemon juice, salt and sugar/honey. Luckily my body was fine with it, but it was pretty varied in strength, saltiness, sweetness and even volume provided in the standard bidon. No gels or bars were provided on course so any nutrition had to be carried or put into the special needs bag for collection on top of the Col d'Izoard and needed to be robust enough to cope with hours of preheating in the sun. 

The day was heating up as we headed up the stunning gorge that marks the proper start of the 16k climb to the top of the Col d'Izoard (2,360m). Following a river upstream was both teasing as well as being cooling. Unfortunately I also found our next major challenge here, a slightly annoying one. Supporters cars vyed with the bikes racing up the very narrow roads that were cut out of the walls of the gorge or through tunnels under them. It was a dangerous mix and totally unnecessary. Personally I think supporters really should have waited to watch their friends from safer vantage points like Briançon or many little towns on the way back from there where you didn't need to drive on the narrow bike course at the same time as those racing to access the route. Last year a friend of mine was knocked off this course and out of the race when hit by a car turning across the racers. He was in 7th place at the time and in great shape. One dream unfulfilled thanks to some careless driver.

Near the top of the Izoard and still enjoying the ride
I felt great ascending the Izoard. I knew it was going to be a good day as I climbed strongly up the final few hairpins through the forest before it opens up at the top into the arid, rock pinnacles of the haute dessert. I felt that I was riding well within myself despite slowly climbing up the top 10 women and should have enough left in the tank for a solid run to hopefully hold or better my position. In fact I was 8th over the col at 100k.

The high desert on Col d'Izoard
I collected my GU gels for the back half of the course, some fresh bottles of "the mix" and a few bits of banana in just a few seconds before using gravity to maximum effect descending fast as I stuffed the food in my back pockets to deal with later. I have learned to descend over the past few years living in the Alps and passed one more girl and many, many guys on the way to Briançon with just two or three heading past me with even greater velocity. It was almost worth a fully vocal whoopety hoot as it is such a fun descent! I held back thinking it was probably not the most professional look, however I still enjoyed a few loud internal yippidee yo's on the way. I also took the opportunity between hairpins and hooting to get some nutrition in, during the straighter bits of the descent and restock the bento box from my pocket for easy access. It was such a warm day I didn't even put my gillet on, something that happens for me (a truly soft Aussie skinned chic) about three times each summer on big descents. I just zipped up my Apres Velo jersey and enjoyed the ride.

The bike had just two challenges and one nice surprise left by the time I hooked left through the roundabouts of fun, vocal crowds in Briançon.
A hot ride back to Embrun into a headwind
The first challenge was the wind. Since we headed up the valley in the morning the wind had shifted and was yet again a headwind, and this time a stronger one as we headed down valley towards Embrun again. I was really careful not to get done drafting so always made sure I was well off the wheel in front as this was a course renowned for umpires that could be a bit one eyed. My recent experience in Alpe D'Huez attested to this risk. Actually here was my pleasant surprise. I ended up having an umpire who decided he liked me as he later said when I saw him after I finished, I always smiled when he passed and was clearly not trying to link up with any other riders to protect myself from the wind. Anyway by the back 50k of the course it was like having a friend supporting on a bike on course as he always gave me the thumbs up or a big smile as he passed. The short steep climbs up the sides of the valley were as expected, tough, hot but not too long. One descent was super loosey goosey with gravel lining each hairpin, but I had sussed that out a few days earlier so no surprises, just a good moment to back off a bit and make sure I got my lines right.
One last hill on the bike course

The final challenge of the bike course was a mental more than physical one. You head back through Embrun at 180k, being teased by being close enough to transition that I saw the lead men out on the run course, including Dan who apparently was so smashed that later in the run he found himself having a little "snooze" in someone's driveway! Anyway I was still one final hill away from the run through and out the opposite side of town. This one was only about 4k to the top but steep and rough, maxing at 22% and utilizing narrow farm roads that would have better suited a mountain bike complete with knobblies! Great to turn at the top though where I saw some road graffiti that said finisher = winner. Very true, and now just the minor detail of a 42.2k trot left so that I could class myself as one. 

One lap down, one to go
The run is two laps around the small protected lake near transition, up a steep path to the town of Embrun  perched on a cliff a few kms away, through the old narrow cobblestone streets past cafes full of supporters or bemused tourists before dropping back down through the veggie patches along the river, crossing the old bridge we rode in on and up the hill in the opposite direction to another village, from where it is nearly all downhill or flat as you head back to transition for another lap. The max grade on the run was +25% so a good challenge to pre-fatigued legs. The day had by then heated up enough to also need to watch out for the melted tarmac sections on the roads. I didn't need to be carrying any more weight on my feet or sticking to the spot!

Nutrition again was interesting with the organisers asking all racers to carry one re-usuable, provided cup, trying to save the 1000s of plastic cups usually used at races and many lost as light blow away rubbish. All a very good idea but somewhat challenging in execution as you worked out where to carry your cup (I opted for upside down in a drinks belt) and it slowed down each aid station. Luckily I was far enough up the field that this really only became an issue by the second lap when the course was much more crowded. There were also significant gaps between some aid stations. I took Erica Csomor's advice and wore a drink belt and then collected two new small flasks of electrolyte at the special needs station at the end of the first lap to bridge the gaps and cover me if I didn't have the chance to collect what I needed. Early in the first lap I was passed by Carla Van Roojen. She went on to post the 2nd fastest run split of the day. Impressive but unfortunately unmatchable by me that day or on that course. However I was happy to find a solid pace and decent form that I held relatively consistently with just a few shortish flat spots during the two laps. The crowds were great and seeing my little but very vocal support crew of the boys, Rob, Tania and Robbie a couple of times each lap was hugely energy boosting too.

The finish was as Embrun-esque as the rest of the race. I finished hot, completely exhausted but happy to have got my pacing right to get to the finish but be ready to fall over at the line, in just under 13hours. I then looked around for a drink and after asking a volunteer or two who seemed surprised by the request, ended up finding the drink station that was on the run course as there was no separate recovery area. Toughen up here kids, if you're done, go sort yourself out! I then collected my truly ugly orange flouro finishers shirt with the three legged man emblazoned on it ("straight to the pool room" with that one!).

Recharging the batteries
So I finished a beautiful, interesting, challenging and very hard Embrunman day. Even better, on a hot and windy day that fueled a 25% DNF or unable to finish due to time cutoffs rate and in a very strong field thanks to one of the largest prize purses on offer, I was able to finish it well. I was happy to be 8th overall femme, 1st veteran femme and in the top 10% of the field (male and female). I was close enough to the top 5 to have heard the 5th place finisher, Carla, who passed me early on the run called through the finish as I went around the lake in my final few kms. All up it was a day best summed up by the word graffitied on the bike course, "Dur". Now I know where the word enDURance comes from. It must have been coined by someone who had been to Embrun on a 15th of August. I am now taking my Duracell batteries for a rapid recharge before my last big race of the season, Challenge Barcelona at the end of Sept.  

A bientôt.

Tuesday, August 21, 2012

Summer love: enjoying the view from here

I recently fell in love, all over again. No, Rob needn't be jealous as there are no men involved. I fell back in love with the Alps. It is Summer and the view from here is wonderful. There is a great soundtrack to go with this blog. As I don't know how to embed it, and to keep my sister happy (she is a lawyer with internet/ copyright background) please just open up this link and run it in the background.

We The Kings, "The View From Here"

After over 2 years of living within these spectacular mountains I hadn't noticed, but I had slowly begun to take them for granted. They are a constant backdrop to all my training and can be a companion, diversion, challenging coach, practical joker or even ferocious foe (like early season this year as I descended in a hailstorm off the Col des Aravis) as I ride, run, swim, ski, work, play or otherwise live in and amongst them. Most days I take active notice of something new, changing, interesting or groovy as I travel through their domain. However with mid-season training becoming more specific, time at a premium as I juggle family, coaching and training demands, my comfort and familiarity dulled my early sense of constant wonder. It took a minor change of scene, changing up the training a bit, a good race or two and some wonderful quiet "girl in mountains" moments to rediscover just how much I love this region. 

Since the disastrously timed bout of bronchitis just before Ironman Zurich, I have raced twice, both times in the southern alps of France. The first was Alpe D'Huez, this year for the court distance race (1.2/30/7) before deciding to take on the mythic Embrunman (3.8/188/42.2). I'll do a race report for Embrun separately as it definitely warrants it, but for now I can summarize it as interesting, hard, hot, odd, beautiful and a bit bizarre.

However Alpe D'Huez was a chance for me to see how I was going 11 days after Zurich. It was also an opportunity to head off to the mountains by myself for a few days as Rob was working and the kids had an overnight randonnee in the Aravis.


Still smiling high on the Alpe
I drove from home on race morning thanks to the very civilized 2pm start time. After registering and getting organised up at Alpe D'Huez I rode down the high narrow road past Villard-Reculas to the start line at Lake Vernay. The water was a very manageable 17o this year (vs 14o last year when I raced the long course here) and despite getting fairly effectively worked including an eye watering elbow in the nose, I had an ok swim. Once out of the water, it was hot and a bit windy. I earned my first ever drafting penalty about 500m from the base of the Alpe kicking up in earnest as I was riding about 5m behind one rider (7m rule here) despite packs of over 10 riders passing me cms off each other's wheels :-/. Anyway... I had a much more positive experience on the 21 hairpins of Alpe D'Huez that make up the final 14k of the bike course. Coralie Lemaire and I passed each other a few times before I finally got away from her in the final 5k. Despite being a clear competitor, her partner, who was leapfrogging her up the climb by car, cheered me on every time I passed and poured water over me to cool me down a few times when he had set himself up to do so for her. Très sympa, appreciated! After serving my penalty which was just a short bonus run at T2, I headed off feeling great for the 7k around the Altiport on top of the Alpe. For the first time this season I passed lots of guys on the rolling mountain trails that make up the loop. Unfortunately only one woman was within range, but I finished a pretty solid 9th overall and 1st masters woman.

Given I had been pretty unwell just a week earlier I was happy with the race as it showed I was getting back to form. However race day was eclipsed by the following 24 hours. That evening I drove over to visit some friends in a chalet back in the Vernay valley. It took me longer to drive there than it had to ride there in the morning as at sunset, the mountains were simply spectacular. I kept stopping to take photos and just suck it in. The road and villages stuck precariously to the edge of precipices, colours richened and then softened, lakes and rivers decorated the valleys as they reflected the last of the day's light before the sky slowly merged with the mountains and all faded to shades of dark blues. 
Huez village at sunset

I'll take the high road
Late light, Villard-Reculas
Shades of blue
The next morning I got up late from my accommodation right by the transition area (thanks Tamsin) and decided to put on my runners and go and investigate the mountains above the village. I headed out with no time, distance or speed objective, just to enjoy for as long as I felt like, as long as I was back home in time to collect the kids from their adventure in the evening. In the end I felt like running all morning and some of the afternoon. I found my way up onto the mountain bike and hiking trails around the high alpine tarns that in winter make up the cross country ski area. The area reminded me a lot of the Western Arthur Range in Tasmania. Although it is clearly without the pristine, wild element that remoteness and access difficulty allows SW Tassie as I ran under ski lifts and gondolas full of mountain bikers headed up above me for another run. Still, I saw very few people once high up above the resort and enjoyed the trails with just my own footfall to listen to. Luckily I only had a bit of battery left in my camera, so although I got to take some pictures to share, I then just enjoyed the views without feeling the need to frame them, cutting them back from lifesize to view or display later.

Although I had visited the area a few times before it had always seemed too busy and commercialized to really shine, criss-crossed with lifts and topped with standard order concrete ski condos, bike and ski shops, restaurants and bars.This time I left knowing I had experienced some of what it was that makes this place so popular, away from the crowds and infrastructure. A great sporting location in a physically spectacular region. 

No planned destination. Paths heading somewhere worth checking out

Alpine tarns / lakes

A world away from the concrete of the resort village

Stopping to smell the flowers

Running on high

Back at home in and around Les Aravis and since down in the Embrun / Briançon region of the Alps I have kept this more fresh eyed perspective and enjoyed anew the Alps in summer each day. Whether driving through, from my bike, with runners or swimmers on, visiting old towns, forts and castles or just picnicing by a river or lake with Rob and the boys we have delighted in the variety of shapes, colours and cultural offerings of the French Alps. There are many great places in the world, however I feel truly privileged to call this high corner of France home just now and have the opportunity to explore and get to know it better. Like a love renewed with some quality time together, I am appreciating the view from here.

I hope you too have the chance to look around you and find a great view to love whether in the fresh snow of Canberra, a crowded summer's coast somewhere in the northern hemisphere or some busy, bright, colourful city. Enjoy.

Wednesday, August 1, 2012

DNF.

Disappointment

DNF. Whatever you had hoped, a DNF (Did Not Finish) spells disappointment for pretty well everyone. For every athlete a specific place or finish time may be a great achievement or well below expectations relative to their own capability and hopes. However nobody trains for and starts a race with the expectation of not reaching the finish line.

I have been proud to consider myself generally a very consistent athlete. I always seem to be able to use all that I have in me on race day. Variable factors impact me like anyone else, weather, injuries, flat tyres ... but I have always got to the start line in good shape and finished even if it didn’t mean the fastest I could, would, might have if XXX didn’t happen. I was proud of giving it my best, right to the end, even if it wasn’t my best ever day. Not this time. 2k into the run a few weeks ago I pulled out and handed my number back to the race officials. DNF. My first ever.

I was at Ironman Zurich, supposedly my "A" race of the season as I was hoping to put down a really solid time on a relatively fast course. I would be helped by the fact it was not too far from home, reducing the impact of travel, and on similar terrain to that I train here; alpine lakes, rolling country roads and a flat run around the lake. All was boding well a week out. I was swimming my fastest ever in training sessions, my run which had been strangely "off" for the first half of the year seemed to be coming back both in training and racing (at the Annecy OD a few weeks ago I ran just 50s slower than my best OD run) and my bike was solid as ever. 

On the day I drove to Zurich I knew something was off though. For months I had been pleased that my immunity held up well despite the triple whammy of iron-distance training, kids coming home with bugs from school and less sleep than I would ideally get. However as my training volume reduced in the pre-race taper, when I should theoretically be recovering energy, I finally let a lurking lurgy in. My chest was tight and my head a few kilos heavier than normal thanks to the hammers that were operating on the inside of it. By the Friday before the race it was clear I was sick with more than a 24 hr nasty. Despite sleep, Vit C, garlic and zinc I was getting worse not better. The night before I was finally no worse and so, ever optimistic that I had done enough to hold it off, I had a chat to Rob and decided to race and give it my best. I knew that I wasn't well but I didn't want to believe that it was too bad and preferred to hope that it was just me being oversensitive prior to a big event as can happen. As a single mum M-F of two young children due to my husband's work schedule, and as an athlete mid-season, I know I can't afford burying myself in a sickness hole that is too deep or takes too long to climb out of. I therefore started the race with more awareness of the possibility of a DNF than ever before. Still, I knew I was fit and prepared for the event, was experienced at this distance and that my body would do all it could on the day when asked. On vera! Let's go and see.

Liam patiently waiting for Mum.

In the first brawl of the swim I struggled getting my breathing to settle as I coughed underwater and tried to hang onto the feet heading past. Crap! Missed them. As it was a pros only start 5 mins ahead of the masses, I was quickly left behind with a couple of weaker swimmers from the pro pack to lead around with no drafting help for most of the 3.8k. 7mins slower than I had hoped, I exited the water and got onto the bike, still hopeful that out of the water I would be better off as coughing up green gunk there becomes a liability to anyone trying to draft me, more so than to me as it was in the swim. 

I rode ok on the first lap through the cool weather and rainstorms passing a few girls and on track for a solid but not sensational ride time, but I still hadn't been able to get my breathing properly settled, and couldn't quite slot into top gear. By the start of the second lap I knew that trying to finish the marathon would likely bury me physically and certainly wouldn't deliver the PB or even top 10 performance I had set myself up for. So I decided to turn it into a long training day and hoped I could finish at least one lap of the run (10.55k) so that I knew all the course, had finished a solid run off the bike and didn't put the fatigue into the legs that would stop me racing elsewhere once I was fully well. Unfortunately even this plan unravelled as 2k out of T2 I couldn't breathe and was coughing more and more. Time to head back and hand in my number to the officials before I got too far away from the finish area and had a long walk. 

End of lap 1, going ok, just not feeling great
Even though I had known for a couple of hours that this was a likely outcome, I still felt absolutely terrible as I pulled off the course next to my friend Esti who was there cheering a crowd of friends on, including me. She had really helped me try and recover prior to the race as I was staying at her place, but now had to console me as I gave up. Despite personal disappointment, I really felt I had let down my friends, husband and kids, coach and others who support me either on course or from afar. Esti, and the others there on the day; Em, Justin, Rob and the boys, said just the right things at the time to help me deal with those feelings of failure to them. Thanks guys! I really appreciated your support, even more so given that it wasn't for a great outcome. Jackson at least did the family proud having a good Ironkids race while I was out on the bike. Well done little roo!

So what happens if you DNF at an ironman? I had never thought of it before. Firstly at the event, make sure you let officials know you have pulled out. At a recent trail running event in my home valley in the Alps a number of people pulled out of the race at night, didn't tell anyone and as a result initiated a search party response while they headed home oblivious. A tri course is not so dangerous to manage, but race organisers are responsible for athletes on course so it is important to let them know you are no longer on it. Secondly, even though I hadn't finished the full course, I had still raced more than 6 hours so needed to get some food, drink and warm clothes on. The food area wasn't yet ready for the flow of athletes expected a few hours later, but still I got some fruit and drinks, my dry clothes bag and then headed home as soon as I could get my bike out of transition to hopefully kickstart a fast recovery.

Mentally I had to manage the disappointment of a major goal not being reached. As I watch the Olympics now, many more athletes will likely have to learn to manage disappointment than the delight of success. Only 3 athletes/teams generally get medals, yet many in each event will have been physically and mentally prepared to aspire to such heights. I think that the difficulty of any goal increases its value, so that when it is achieved (and hopefully for mine still will be) it is even sweeter for the knowledge of how hard it has been to get everything just right to get there. At least I don't need to wait 4 years to my next opportunity! As I got full blown bronchitus after the race I also know that I did the right thing pulling out of the race rather than risking my health further. 12 days later I had just about fully recovered and was able to go to Alpe D'Huez to race the CD triathlon there, finishing a solid 9th (1st masters). Importantly for me too, I didn't get so sick I couldn't look after my kids properly during that time. 

A really interesting experience was the physical / muscular recovery post Zurich. Although I was unwell, and didn't train for a week or so after the race, my body recovered after the swim and bike legs really fast. I felt hugely different to the way I do usually after a full ironman. It just illustrated to me very clearly that the real muscular damage and deep fatigue that comes after an ironman is really the result of pounding the pavement pre-fatigued in the marathon. 

Enjoying every finish. Jackson at Zurich
Now a few weeks later I get to sign up to the legendary Embrunman which includes a stunning alpine lake swim that starts in the dark following a lit kayak, +5,000m climbing in the 188k bike course including the Col d'Izoard (at 2,360m) and a hilly marathon around the town and surrounds. Not a place for PBs! An amazing race though and one I couldn't have put into my schedule this year if I had finished the race in Zurich and was still in recovery phase. Another long day to plan for and a top 10 place to aspire to. After always receiving a finishers t-shirt/medal/... from every race I had started, and really only ever getting excited by place or time goals, not the finish itself, I now have a new respect for the act of crossing that line at the end. Nothing is certain in long course racing. Finishing is a privilege hard earned. 

If you do happen to DNF along the way in your journey (figuratively or literally), I hope you find that is a step on the road to eventual success and hopefully an opportunity to respect your achievement and savor the moment even more fully next time you cross that finish line.

À bientôt
Christine